About Me

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las vegas, nevada, United States
i am Carrie Ann Kawa , i am a poet, a writer, music lover, i enjoy intresting conversations, i love the words of others , i have a deep faith in something bigger then myself , i enjoy life instead of complaining about it , i look at the stars, have a wicked sence of humor and i know some where down the line i will be where i need to be for today is today. i walk where i have no place to go , i talk when there is nothing to say , i dream when i am awake . i am carrie and that is all i am ever going to be .

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

MR.SALT

He wears a peacock feather in an old magic hat
Wearing red lipstick, sucking on a candy cane
He knew the devil intimately, for he wears the mark on his right cheek
An open black shirt,crucifix around his neck
Black jeans with a razor in his pocket, boots that look older than time
He looks like he has been around the world--- exotic is his smell
Long black and silver hair, tied in a pony tail
He smiles at me my flesh begins to crawl
He is irritating the passengers on the bus
Passing on his words of wisdom, nobody is listening except for me; the words are weird, the language obscure,and the reality of his wisdom hangs heavy upon my heart
The bus stops and he gets off with a tip of his hat , but there is nothing there, for the desert is wide and lonely
Before the bus moves on with its busy ,restless people
I look back and he is nowhere in sight, and I am not surprised
CAK 4/1997
I WAS LIVING IN SEASIDE N.J NOT THAT HAS ANY THING TO DO WITH "MR.SALT"
THIS IS THE FIRST IN ABOUT I THINK 8 ABOUT " MR.SALT"
THE NEXT ONE IS CALLED "THE OPENING" I WILL POST THAT ON WES.6/03/2009
UNTIL THEN I WILL SIMPLY BE ME AND YOU BE YOU

THE REAPERS ROSE GARDEN

Where dead souls grow from the roots of life
The reapers rose garden is nowhere , but everywhere in the mind
No night , no day
Statues of horseman fighting battles in hell
An angel is shackled down playing instruments of the dead
The reaper sits in a stone chair
A man with no feet tells him the gossip of century pass
There is a Billy goat , two ravens and a vulture,and they are having a tea party with blood and bones
In the distance the reaper watches the childern play, with hands covering their eyes,while poison ivy grabs at their feet
He sits watches and waits
He picks a blood red rose inhaling deeply
A smile crosses his white ,like the death of what he is, face
A soul is ready to be taken
This soul hangs on to life , but he knows it will join the garden as they all do
CAK 2/1992
THIS ONE WAS WRITTEN WHILE I LIVED IN PERTH AMBOY N.J IT CAME FROM A DREAM I WOKE UP WITH THE IMAGE AND THE TITLE AND HERE IT IS OFCOURSE IT IS 17YEARS OLD WOW TIME FLYS WHEN YOUR STILL WRITING I WAS 18 AND GOING THROUGH A VERY TOUGH TIME
I CANNOT STRESS FOR ME AT LEAST HOW IMPORTANT MY MUSES ARE TO ME CERTAIN PEOPLE INSPIRE ME IT IS A RARITY SOME TIMES I WILL GET INSPIRED BY A PERSON ON THE BUS ,OR A SONG, MY MOM WAS A BIG INSPIRATION ,MY BROTHER GIVES ME A LOT THEN THERE IS THE ONES I CANNOT EXPLAIN IT IS A MENTAL FIGHT I GO TO WRITE AND AN IMAGE POPS IN MY HEAD AND FOR ME IT IS A LOSING BATTLE I WRITE WHAT I SEE AND FEEL, THIS IS WHEN I AM THE MOST ME.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

its oh so QUITE

HEY, HI, HOW IS IT GOING

ME IT IS GOING ----NOT BAD, MY MIND HAS BEEN TRAVLING AT STRANGE SPEEDS
MY WRITING HAS TAKEN ON A STRANGE VIBE, TOO MUDDLE WITH CERTAIN THOUGHTS THAT I AM NOT FOCUS ENOUGH.

THERE IS HOPE ON THE HORIZON , I HAVE BEEN GATHERING ALL MY POEMS ABOUT TWO LOVERS THAT HAS THE WORLD, TIME , AND EVERY THING ELSE AGAINST THEM ITS MY EPIC, NOT TO SAY I DO NOT HAVE ANOTHER EPIC THAT ONE IS ABOUT AN ANGEL THAT QUESTION HIS FAITH, IN GOD AND IN THE HUMAN RACE ----YOU KNOW WHAT JUST OFF THE CUFF I WILL POST THE ANGEL ONE IN WEEKY INSTALLMENTS, TOMORROW WILL BE "THE REAPERS ROSE GARDEN " THEN IN THE SAME DAY I WILL BRING YOU "MR, SALT" BOTH WRITTEN IN DIFFERENT TIMES OF MY LIFE BUT BOTH IN NEW JERSEY HOW ODD IS THAT


WELL UNTIL NEXT TIME KEEP YOUR FEET ON THE GROUND BECAUSE I HEAR GRAVITY CAN BE A BITCH.
SEE YOU

Thursday, May 21, 2009

ITS THE END OF THE WORLD AS YOU KNOW IT

YES FRIENDS SELL NOW GO TO A BOMB SHEALTER ( JUST KIDDING) THE HUMAN RACE IS JUST UNNERVEING ME
I JUST WISH CONVERSATION WERE HOW SHOULD WE SAY MORE INTELLIGENT
SHARON ONE OF MY FRIENDS JUST SAID TO ME YOU AND ME ARE THE OLNY ONES THAT KNOW WHERE WE CAN SPOT SMART PEOPLE AND FOR A MINUTE I PONDER THIS , SHES RIGHT I MEAN I DO TALK TO IDIOTS I KNOW THIS BUT IDIOTS NEVER INSPIRE ME THEY DONT GET MY CREATIVE FLOWING .

BA WEEP GRANA WEEP MEEN BOG UNIVERSAL GREETING (ALE TRANSFORMER THE MOVIE) I WARNED YOU I AM STRANGE.

HOPE EVER ONE HAS A NICE HOLIDAY, NEW POEM ON THE WES 5/27/2009 ITS TITLE IS THE REAPERS ROSE GARDEN I WROTE IT IN FEB OF 1993 I WAS 18 AND SO DEPRESSED NOW I 35 AND EVER SO ODD, BUT IT ONE OF MY POEMS THAT MY BROTHER SAID WOW YOU DO HAVE TALENT. HOPE YOU ENJOY

WELL THATS ALL FOR TONIGHT SLEEP WELL AND IF YOU HAVE NOY SEEN IT ,SEE THE MOVIE ONCE THE MUSIC IN IT IS AWSOME. SO STAND IN THE PLACE THAT YOU LIVE, I HAVE BEEN LISENTING TO A LOT OF REM THEY BEEN IN MY HEAD LATELY SO HAS THE SMITHS GIRLFRIEND IN A COMA THAT ONE WILL NOT LEAVE MY CERBAL CORTEX SO I HUM IT A LOT

SEE YOU LATER

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

NAMELESS

She has fallen; into the depths
There is a city where the sun does not rise
Forever is,darkness life
This city with its sin in such plain sight
Has no name,and too call it by a name your tongue will be cut out and giving to the birds of prey
For your words will feed their elaborate appetite
The mainstrret, in the city of no name is "end" there is no beginning
It crosses with Armageddon
On the corner sits a church,as a king to this fallen kingdom
It looms over the city in judgement,as the faithless pray there, in ritual of a forgotten time
This is not a sanctuary, the paint is old, maroon in color---like stained blood of innocents
A cross of deep mahogany stands on top of this church of debaucher
She is there strapped to it half dead half alive
The goddess of the sun,her light long gone
The night eats at her
The citizens of nameless throw pointed rocks to cut her feet
Her wings stained with blood
She is not their martyr,but their victim
They call her names the words cut her deeply
Tears fall on the ground they split on the her own waters
She screams a howl so deep, you cannot help but feel it,and still they wound her
The childern play "ring around the roses'
Hands join togther as they circle the church
Their child rhyme in its demented taunt slowly kills her they chant and chant with their laughter
In the church the choir hymns begin,and it sounds like a sickness
She weeps and screams----"we have fallen into the depths to never emerge,forever gone"
A deep tremor shakes nameless, ever so felt by the citizens
They run to the goddess of the sun,raising their hands to her
Chanting deliver us ,deliver us
She died and turned in to light and dispersed
They looked, and then they simply went about as nothing happened
"Blind and stupid"
Said the man all dressed in black, gold pocket watch in hand, coming in with an agenda
Shades blacker then the eyes that are behind them,except when they are blue then you know that something is about to begin
The city of no name ; now runs with seas of evil
The darker ,ever so darker
He toys with them
"welcome me my faithless one deliver onto me and you will see
Nameless goes up in flames of complete hatred
He goes back to his chariot,with three chained angels in hand
Kidnapped them from forever to take for the now
They belong to him,he touches their forehead now they are reborn:Despair,Hate,and selfish
Names he has gaven, his taken ,fallen angels dressed in ghetto whore style
He takes the reigns
The souls of nameless usher him into a new age
His watch starts again
The time has begun
CAK 4/2005
INSPIRED BY: IN THE AIR TONIGHT,SEND ME AN ANGEL AND TOOLS SOBER
I GET STRANGE IMAGES WHEN I LISTEN TO MUSIC IF IT IS REALLY GREAT MUSIC THE STRANGER THE IMAGES SO
NEXT WES 5/27/2009 I WILL POST ANOTHER POEM OLD OR NEW WHO KNOWES
MORE LIKLY I WILL BLOG BEFORE HAND ON ANY GIVEN SUBJECT THAT IS ON MY MIND
LIKE ON HOW PEOPLE CAN DUMP ON YOU BECAUSE THERE LIFE IS NOT WHERE THEY WANT IT TO BE,OR THAT YOUR "BOSS" THAT HAPPENS TOO HAVE THE SAME NAME AS YOU DO DOSE NOT EXPLAIN HER SELF WELL SHE JUST HAS GRUNT NOISES TO REPLIE TO YOUR QUESTIONS
OR SHE MAKES YOU FEEL STUPID EVEN THOUGH SHE DID NOT NOT TELL ME SOMETHING I NEEDED TO KNOW .I SHOULD NOT HAVE TO SHARE A NAME WITH HER
I WAS NAMED AFTER A SONG BY THE HALLIES
RIGHT NOW I AM JUST VENTING
HOPE YOU ENJOY THE POEM A LITTLE TASTE OF THE STRANGE,
SEE YOU LATER

Monday, May 18, 2009

I KNOW MESSED UP PEOPLE

I DO NOT HAVE TOO MUCH TIME , BUT THE PEOPLE I TALK TOO ARE MESSED UP .I THOUGHT THE PEOPLE ON THE BUS WERE STRANGE ,BUT NO WAY. ALSO I WAS LOOKING THROUGH MY BLOG'S AND I MESSED UP ON PAPER DOLL MASSACAR THERE IS A WHOLE PHRASE MISSING BECAUSE MY TYPING SUCKS. ON WES.5/20/2009 I WILL POST A POEM TITLED "NAMELESS" IT IS A DEMENTED LITTLE POEM BASED ON PICTURES I SEE IN MY HEAD. MAYBE THERE NOT MESSED UP MAYBE ITS JUST ME. NO ITS THEM. WELL I HAVE TO GO YOU KNOW GETTING MY EDUCATION FOR MY FUTURE THE SAD PART IS MY ACCOUNT INSTRUTOR SAID TO ME MAKE SURE YOU AUTOGRAPH YOUR FIRST BOOK TO ME" EVEN THOUGH I GET AWSOME GRADES HE THINKS MY FUTURE IS IN MY WRITING . I JUST NEED A GREAT EDITOR AND ALSO FEEDBACK FROM PEOPLE OR PERSON WHO HAS READ MY WORK , BUT WHAT CAN YOU DO. GOODNIGHT FOR NOW.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

WHERE HAVE ALL THE (STRANGE GUYS GONE)

Why can't I FIND SOMEONE AS ODD as me or is he hiding, not aware of his inner strangness,
yes there is the oh my god you want to do what with me I AM NOT REFERRING to the way out there perverted freak and there is the god squad guy looking for the (good girl) no I am talking about the ever so normal i have a teddy bear since I was two ,I miss my childhood ,I LOOKING FOR A girl with substance ( A GIRL LIKE YOU) yes i am moody ,I LOVE TO KISS for long periods of time, not just get into the something ,something, because when all thats said and done you can measure a guy by his eyes, hands, the way he kisses you, the way he looks at you,the way he talks, the way he thinks,and if he makes you laugh.

I want a conversation, I WANT to get lost in his world and roam around and find what makes him tick and vica a versa. I do not need the romantic garabage of fake sentiment, so many have tried to figure me out,and gave up. I was either to smart,to weird,to strange,to indepenant ,to me (that one is my favorite i am being to much myself) what cowards. I read too much,I LOVE MUSIC TOO MUCH, Iwatch too many movies , I think too highly of myself. I do not need to be saved, I need to be able too be me and hang out with someone that gets me,and we swim pass the breakers and watch the world die

just needed too vent so many friends ,but enough ears. ITS funny how that works when your the listerner, but hey what can you do . My best friend happens to be my brother and he already knows all this and he so bored with me .

GOODNIGHT ON 5/20/2009 wes I WILL post another one of my poems I not sure if it will be old or new you have to wait I will serve you more of my tasty brain matter to wash down lifes unfair way. I know you sit back and think if olny the real question is if olny what? what are you looking for. I am looking for---- you know what i am not even sure maybe thats the problem if I don't know how can I EXPECT ANY one else too . see you later

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

SILVER HORSERIDER

Acid tongue faith healer, your finger is on the pulse
There is a beat to the rhythem of the stillness of one
You told your secret you told it the evil inside
It had its way with you
Like a kite in the wind tossing you about
Furious with the sound of the crash
Fist on drums , teeth grinning on the faded
It is what it is and you hold the bloodiest part of the day
Traveler of the sun, blackness like the nothing of what it is
You stand in the middle and let the wave of animosity hit you straight on, then crash
Dog warrior of the seventh sky, ninja warrior
Plot your way into your unholy war , and welcome the stab ,the slash
The death ritual samurai
It comes at all cost; you smile like a true lunatic
A messenger of a god that never was
You are and not and never will be
Consequence of one that is so old and yet so young
wish it and it will be SILVER HORSERIDER
CAK 6/23/2008
I WROTE THIS ON MY 35TH BIRTHDAY AT 11:55P.M THE TIME OF MY BIRTH
IT WAS MY FIRST BIRTHDAY WITHOUT MY MOM AND I WROTE THIS IN LESS THEN A MINUTE
HOPE YOU ENJOY
GOOD BY FOR NOW OR SEE YOU LATER

Monday, May 11, 2009

WALKING IN THE BLUE

I am having one of those strange days; life keeps dealing me strange stuff. I wish I could just go back in time and have a do over, but you do not learn from do overs. I was listening too some jazz on the the way to school, and found myself relaxing. I wish that random people would stop asking me are you married and when I say no they say what happen what the hell is that. If I wanted to be married I WOULD BE, but I DO NOT WANT TO GET MARRIED OR HAVE CHILDERN, I guess that makes me a bad person. when I WAS young life still seemed complicated everbody used to say to me oh you make a good wife and mother. now people assume because I DON'T have a man to answer to I a bad female on the lose. I let them think what they want , besides they project off of me there thoughts and I FIND out a lot about them, I AM sneeking that way. people tell me a lot I KEEP IT TO MY SELF ,but you would not belive what people will tell you, including to a face like mine oh off of subject cheak out marvel comic presents back in 1993/1994 weapon x barry windsor smith that is an awsome story for all you x-men fans goodnight for now

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

IN MY SWEET DARKNESS

you can see my smile, and know there is something wicked when you look into my eyes
Nothing is ever what it seems
Iam too strange,a little too much of a bite
I love watching the reaction of the normal's when I start to talk about the world I know, and the things I think about
The city under my microscope
The shock to the system, the faded soul
I am the bright one in the backround; I cast such a beautiful shadow
The need for superficial beauty bores me
Irather take you on a journey with my hands and the obscure language of someone so weird and unfashionable
I never strive for perfection,just the ease of being me
Cool jazz on the radio, sitting back watching the world implode onto itself
My true cynical side emerges
I do not need or want what everybody wants
I want my words to have power
My eyes to pierce the soul of my chosen victim
I want my hands to make magic out of the elements around me
I want time to be elusive and never catch up with me
As much as the world can see my light
I want it to see my darkness as well
CAK 5/01/2009
I just want to say hello greeting and salutation
Just because you grow up and become an (adult) dose not give you the right to forget the child inside
I suggest do something crazy and fun like play pinball .when I was young that all I did and rollerskated I love too rollerskate also I my mom was a little how should we say '"unblanced"
so we traveled a lot which gave me an intersting perspective on life
youth is all in your mindset if you think young so be it, if you think old well I feel sorry for you
now you can be wise and still think young
just something to think about
do not let the fear of looking foolish guide you
I think way too much, just some thoughts Iwanted to share. so enjoy some of my tastey grey matter
goodnight for now

Monday, May 4, 2009

where its at

I am bored out of my mind, again its 7:00 pm and one of my instructers did not come in. so that leaves me 20 min before I catch the bus and go home. on wes.05/06/2009 I will post another poem.A little strange one fresh from my mind. hopefully any one out there will like it . My last one did not go over very well with my friend. She was very candid with her thoughts. maybe someone out there liked it who knowes and I really do not care . these are my inner most thoughts all dirty and strange for those who welcome that enjoy the taste of my grey matter. I WILL try to offer different flavors for your reading pallet, I have enough in me too go around . THIS is just the beginning . well it is time for me to go hope life is going the way you think it should, and if there any one you should say hello to in the moring do so you never know if they miss it stranger. goodnight strange people of the underworld.